How to talk to him?
As a rule, in the life of every woman there are periodically situations when it is necessary to call your boyfriend or husband for a serious conversation. However, representatives of the stronger sex are not always open to such a conversation, and the reason for this may be a number of factors. Dear ladies, let's find out together how to talk with him, what time to choose for such a conversation and how to present your request or desire to achieve the desired result.
When we get married?
This question, if it does not sound from the girl’s mouth every half hour, then at least constantly turns in her thoughts. The reason for this is that the weaker sex attaches great importance to family and marriage, a woman needs a stable union. In addition, many women sincerely dream of family dinners in a country house and charming kids running around in the garden.
However, men come to such thoughts much later and less willingly. Therefore, your constant conversations on this topic will inevitably lead to the opposite effect: your boyfriend will think that you are encroaching on his freedom.Even if you madly want to marry your boyfriend, do not say it out loud every day, but do everything to make him want it himself.
I want children!
This phrase usually becomes a continuation of the first paragraph. Again, the desire to have children is more inherent in a woman, not for nothing that we all heard about the maternal instinct. But the man, being the main earner in the family, feels a great responsibility for her. Therefore, it is possible that your husband simply believes that he is not earning enough money to plan for replenishment in the family. In this situation, when you think about how to talk with him about the child, it is better to try to cheer him up and say that financial difficulties are completely solvable.
There are cases when a man does not decide on planning children for purely psychological reasons. Perhaps he is not ready morally, often even to the point that such a responsibility inspires him with panic. Here it is necessary to show maximum understanding, but not gross perseverance, and all the more pressure. Explain to your husband that together you will definitely cope, and tell him that he can always count on your help.
You earn less than others
Constant reproaches and comparisons in conversations are the most frequent female mistakes. When only accusations are used, and the logic of reasoning and common sense go into the background, the man begins to simply ignore your words. He already knows by heart that "Peter bought a second car, but he does not even have one." Well, if you want to never have a car, you are on the right track. After all, such statements only root in the man's opinion that he is a loser and he does not succeed. Consequently, there is no desire to strive for anything: all the same, nothing will come of it.
Try to replace such tactics with the opposite, tell your husband that he is capable / smart / talented. Your man will start to believe in his own strength and, last but not least, will do everything so that you are not so disappointed in him, so wonderful. He will trust you and share his plans, and you will be able to give him good advice.
We conduct conversation correctly
It is difficult for a woman to restrain her emotions and impulses, but sometimes it is simply necessary to maintain peace in a relationship. If your boyfriend or husband is out of sorts, starting a serious conversation is almost meaningless.It is better to talk to him about the reasons for his bad mood or to try to distract him from his dark thoughts.
Also remember that requests are usually much more efficient than requirements. Coercion to something always repels a person, rather than encourages action. It is better for people who love each other at all not to resort to claims in conversations.
In conclusion, it should be said that most women turn into a long monologue in a conversation with a man. Be prepared to listen to the opinion of your boyfriend or husband, as well as objectively evaluate his position on a specific issue. Otherwise, there will be no good result from the conversation.